May you not fight or rob, but have time to reward you.
Life has a long way to go, and nothing is more likely to cause trouble than one word--
fight!
fight for right or wrong with your lover, win truth, lose affection;
win or lose with relatives, win the result, lose happiness;
fight for gains and losses with friends, win small profits and lose affection.
there is no complete right or wrong in the world. If you have to fight for a reason for everything, then you would be too tired to live.
when you reach a certain age, you will understand that there are three things in life that cannot be disputed.
-01-
Don't fight for right or wrong with your lover
Nebula mage's book tells a classic story:
there are two families in the city. One is Zhang and the other is Li.
the Zhang couple jump every day, often punching and punching each other.
the Li couple respect each other and almost never blush.
the wife of the Zhang family was so envious that she asked the Li family for advice on how to maintain harmony.
I didn't expect the Li family to reveal the secret:
"all the people in your family are good people, they are all right and there is nothing wrong, so they quarrel; in our family, they all admit their mistakes and feel bad, so our family does not quarrel."
seeing that Zhang's wife was still puzzled, Li's wife pointed to the flowerpot in the corner and said:
this pot of flowers is placed here. If someone in your family accidentally breaks it, he won't think it's his fault. Instead, he will shout, "who put the pot here?"
the other person is not willing to be outdone: "how did I play it?" Who told you to walk without long eyes? "
both sides want to fight between right and wrong, and it's hard not to quarrel.
but not in my family. If someone broke the flowerpot, he bowed his head and said, "Sorry, it was my accident." Another person will apologize: "Oh, I don't blame you. I shouldn't have put it here."
if both sides do not dispute who is right and who is wrong, the smoke of gunpowder will naturally settle down.
husband and wife are together for a lifetime, apart from romance, as well as firewood, rice, oil and salt, friction and discord are inevitable, just like the broken flowerpot.
if you say a word and think that you are reasonable and want to fight for a red face, then the fragments of the flowerpot will go into the hearts of two people sooner or later.
even if it is true that you are wrong and I am right, it may not be friendly and happy.
you know, there is no right or wrong in family affairs, only discord.
fighting for right or wrong with a lover is like using one fire to put out another fire, which will not only outweigh the gain, but also fuel the fire and cause catastrophe.
in fact, for a couple, right or wrong is not so important.
Don't worry about right or wrong, take a step back, and everything will be broad.
-02-
win or lose with relatives
once received a message from a reader backstage to complain about his mother.
she said that after her mother retired, she came to her own city to live with her.
however, the habits of the two generations are very different.
what annoys her most is that her mother always likes to eat leftovers.
A pot of meat is boiled over and replaced with different vegetables. even if there is only one pot of soup left in the end, my mother is never reluctant to pour it down, always saying: save the noodles for tomorrow morning.
she argued with her mother countless times, all of which ended in her own failure.
she felt particularly frustrated: why can she never win over her mother?
I have to say, similar situations are very common in life:
you hope they don't always store things and throw away what they should throw away, and they will say you waste it.
you hope they don't turn off the lights all the time, turning on and off dues and electricity, so that they all turn a deaf ear to it.
.
it seems that in front of our loved ones, we are always tit-for-tat, trying to get a result and win.
however, if you win or lose with your relatives, it is they who are not comfortable; if you lose, it is yourself who is unhappy.
in fact, people's ideas can not be changed overnight, instead of forcing them not to come, it is better to let nature take its course.
Confucius said: "when it comes to parents, they don't follow their aspirations, they respect them, and they don't complain about their hard work."
is talking about.
is different from your parents' ideas, you should first exhort them in a gentle voice. If you can't convince your parents, go with it. There's no need to win or lose everything.
what is argued is reason, and what is lost is love.
Don't force everything to be what you want, try to think about it from their point of view so that everything can be happy.
-03-
Don't fight for gain or loss with friends
have you heard the story of Liuzhu Lane?
Zhang Ying, a bachelor in Wenhua Hall during the reign of Kangxi, and the Wu family next door have always been good friends.
between the two courtyards, there is a neither wide nor narrow alley, which is used for entry and exit on weekdays.
one day, the Wu family wanted to expand their new house and want to occupy the alley.
as it happens that Zhang Ying is away from home, the Zhang family is not happy.
after all, this is a common place between the two families. Why should I give it to you?
the two sides quarreled endlessly, and their former good friends almost had a relationship.
when Zhang Ying learned about this, she specially repaired a letter and sent it from thousands of miles away.
"Thousand miles of books are only for the wall, so why not let him have three feet?" the great wallIt is still there today, but I can't see Qin Shihuang at that time. "
after reading the letter, the family suddenly realized.
they voluntarily gave up three feet of open space, and the Wu family also volunteered to give up three feet of housing.
since then, there has been a famous "six-foot alley" in Tongcheng, leaving behind a story that has lasted through the ages.
Yes, what's wrong with giving him three feet?
people, if you are too penny-pinching, you will lose a lot of things.
The awe-inspiring red prom dresses is all you need; it is an essential. We have it all – a perfect choice for the most formal and casually informal occasions.
if you let the other person three feet, the other person will give you three feet.
acquaintance with friends is magnanimity, friendship is affection.
it doesn't matter to let three feet go, it's okay to suffer a little loss.
relax your mind a little bit, fight for less gains and losses, and you will find that everything suddenly becomes clear.
-04-
the rest of my life is long, quiet but undisputed
such jokes have been circulated on the Internet:
A reporter asked a hundred-year-old man, "Why do you live so long?"
the old man replied, "because I never argue with anyone."
the reporter found it hard to believe: "you have never argued with anyone in your life, it is impossible!"
the old man responded with an indifferent smile: "maybe you are right."
Lin Yutang said, "if you don't argue, it's a big argument." If there is no dispute, there will be no dispute among people all over the world. "
the so-called "no dispute" is aimed at temporary right and wrong, win or lose, gains and losses.
the so-called great struggle refers to long-term harmony, peace and happiness.
indisputable is the great wisdom of life.
not only can you achieve others, but also you can accomplish yourself.
instead of fighting over everything, it is better to pass through the world magnanimously with an undisputed heart.
by then, life will be at ease and everything will take advantage of the mind.
the rest of my life is long, quiet and undisputed.
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one book a week, no matter how busy it is, don't forget to recharge it.
Wen Qian, professional teacher of university broadcast host, Putonghua tester, member of Hubei recitation artists Association.
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